I’ve always been open about the way I feel and tonight would be no different. I felt nervous every time I thought about what I was going to do, but I had to do it. Tonight I had some life changing news for my girlfriend, Sarah. She’s open about the way she feels too and I don’t know how she’s going to take it. I’ll admit I’m expecting her to hit me… or throw me into a moving car. Hopefully she’ll understand why I’m doing it and won’t mind too much. Who am I kidding? Obviously she is going to mind, like I said it’s a life changing piece of news!

I took a deep breath as I knocked on Sarah’s front door and waited for her to answer. As usual it took her about ten minutes to come to the door. I was thinking about leaving as the door opened and her smiling face appeared. I must admit she did look stunning. Nothing in the world could ever change the way she appeared in my eyes. Beautiful. I worshipped the way she looked, but that wouldn’t change what I had to do tonight. I smiled at her nervously as she walked out of the door and linked her arm through mine. I could feel myself shaking as I opened the taxi door for her and watched her get inside. I followed her and shut the door with a slam as the taxi took off towards the restaurant we would be eating at.

Inside the taxi we were covered in darkness but I could still make out her pretty face staring out of the window as different things passed us. I bit my lip nervously as I looked away from her. I hated hurting people and tonight I was definitely going to hurt someone. But I shouldn’t be concentrating on that… as long as I was happy nothing else should matter. Except I also want Sarah to be happy, maybe she will be happy after tonight.

The taxi pulled up outside of the restaurant and I watched Sarah ease out of the door gracefully in her nice dress. I passed the driver some money then followed her out. Putting my hand on her back I directed her towards the doors. Pushing them open with my free hand we both walked through to be greeted by a fancy looking waiter. I didn’t usually spend this much time and effort on our dates, Sarah probably had an inkling I was up to something. She rolled her eyes with a smirk as the waiter steered us through the snob covered tables. We both started laughing as we passed an old woman with some sort of peacock on her head, I think it was meant to be a hat. Finally we were seated at our small table in the corner of the room. I picked up the menu to hide my face immediately. I couldn’t look at her knowing that at the end of this meal I had something that could shatter hearts.

After dithering about what she wanted to eat, Sarah finally decided and placed her order with the waiter. I copied her choice of food and ordered us both some expensive sounding wine. When the waiter had left us alone I had no choice but to look at her and try to make some sort of conversation. I could feel Sarah’s green eyes burning into me as I looked down at the table and began to mess about with my fork. I wanted to blurt out what was bothering me when she asked, but it was too early. I didn’t want to ruin a great night, plus I paid a hefty some of money for this reservation. Gradually I picked up the courage to take a peak at Sarah. Unsurprisingly she was slumped in her chair looking bored. I hadn’t really picked the best type of date for her. She would have preferred a lively club with unlimited amounts of alcohol and a dance floor waiting for her to strut her stuff. I loved to watch her dance, but it wasn’t intimate enough.

After a long silence and awkward glances our food came. At least now I had an excuse for my silence. I picked up my fork and began to eat silently. Sarah looked at me with one last aggravated look before picking up her own fork and eating her own food. We both knocked back the wine, me wanting to get rid of the nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach; Sarah wanting to drown out the fact I was practically ignoring her. After we had munched our way through first and second course and were waiting for our desert I realised I was on my way to becoming hammered. It was a bad sign really, but Sarah looked like she was the same. As I fumbled about with the napkin in my lap I heard her giggling to herself, looking up I noticed she had a spoon dangling from her nose. Original, I’ll give her that. I smiled at her and soon I had also broke out into a fit of giggles. Yes, me, a grown man giggling. I stretched my hand out in front of me as I smothered my face with my free hand, trying to get rid of the giggling sounds coming from it. As I looked up I felt something or rather someone entwine their hand in mine. I looked at my hand where it was resting with Sarah’s holding it tightly. Our eyes met as I looked up at her. I could tell she was trying to solve the problem that was making me feel cold towards her. Little did she know it would be solved after this meal. I pulled my hand away quickly as another waiter appeared with our desert.

Leaving the restaurant almost brought my food back up. I had hold of Sarah’s hand in my dampening palm and another hand rubbing my stomach. I had a lump in my throat and I was biting so hard on my lip that I had started to taste blood. But nothing would stop me as soon as we got back to my place. That actually came quicker than I would have liked. It seemed as if we stepped out of the restaurant and straight into my living room. I stood in the doorway as Sarah made her way over to the window. I hadn’t bothered turning any lights on, all I could see was the moonlight pouring in to fall over Sarah’s body making her seem enchanted. I walked over to her with the intention of letting her know why I had been so different. The minute I got to her she spun around with an accusing look in her eyes. When she asked me what was wrong I didn’t know what to say. I stuttered and felt myself start to sweat with nerves. Sarah just rolled her eyes and chuckled before wrapping her arms around my neck and pulling my lips into hers. I felt the soft movement of her wonderful kisses taking me over and making all the nerves leave my body and be replaced with excitement. I could feel her hand running through my hair until she grabbed a tuft of it and deepened the kiss. Before getting carried away and too into the moment I pushed her away from me and took a deep breath. Sarah looked at me disappointed and upset. I grabbed her hand and enclosed it my larger hands. Her looked turned into one of confusion as I reached into my pocket and pulled a small box out. Opening it one handed I showed it to her and got down on one knee. Before asking the big question I looked up to see her eyes watering as she became overwhelmed by the moment.

“Sarah, will you marry me?” I finally asked.